Saturday, February 16, 2008


Oh yeah, we're still waiting. No news whatsoever. I finally emailed our agency just to make sure there we no updates of any kind yet, and was told "we are still expecting to hear news of your court date soon." I do realize it's not been 3 weeks quite yet (and that's how long we were told it could take), but Tuesday will be the 3 week mark... so we're almost there. In this stage it's becoming increasingly difficult to not compare ourselves with the timelines other people (even with our same agency) have had from referral to court date to court itself. We aren't setting any records yet for how long it's taking, but I'm still struggling with the wait for news at this point. I THINK (keyword is think here) that I'll be a bit more at ease once we at least know whether or not they are giving us a court date at this time, or making us wait until Liv and Ez have been in care for 3 months and then reapply for a date at that time.

It's all part of the process, and I am doing my best to wait patiently. I just can't say it's easy. Some days our little angels seem like more of a dream than a reality. Having heard nothing new about them since the day we first heard of them... it starts to feel like none of it's real. This past week became increasingly difficult since we are waiting and hoping that we may get an update and new pictures from a wonderful new friend that was there picking up her daughter at the same orphanage. Once she gets home and settled in, we will hopefully get to lay our eyes on new pictures of our babies!!!

Ok, now pray for my sanity as we wait "patiently" for news. Poor Joe is doing so well tolerating my whining and baby talking obsession, but I know we both need an update soon!

OT - We took Chloe to see the oncologist and another neurologist today. The oncologist felt that since we are still able to control Chloe's symptoms with Prednisone and Cyclosporine after all this time, that it likely IS NOT Lymphoma! No guarantees... but it was hopeful news. He said if it is Lymphoma, that we should expect to see her declining very soon, so it'll be a tenuous few weeks/months. Our little girl is so precious to us, so we'll do whatever we can to keep her comfortable and help her fight the bad zee-bees attacking her brain! Go Chloe! She's such a fighter... even after 4+ months of this!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Some days up, some days down...

Yep, I hate waiting. I know it's only be 2 weeks now that we've been waiting for a court date, but it feels like a lot longer. Other families with our agency have gotten court dates in just under 2 weeks, and since we don't know what'll happen with our court date (will they give us one or make us wait until after 3 months to assign a date), the waiting is particularly difficult.

A cyber friend of mine is currently at Toukoul picking up her beautiful daughter. While she's there, she's planning to look in on our precious ones, and possibly even take some pictures if she can. On her blog today, there was a post from her stating that she'd met her daughter, and would be trying to get info on our kiddos soon. Oi! It's harder and easier knowing that someone is going to see them. Obviously I'd rather it be me over there meeting them and wrapping my arms around them, but since it can't be... yet... I'm just thrilled that she's going to take some time and learn what she can. I'm dying to know what they're like. Are they laid back, fussy, smiley, what?!??! Any little piece of information would be so exciting. Just knowing someone else has seen them, makes it feel that much more real.

So, to add to the adoption roller-coaster, we're still battling whatever mystery illness Chloe has. When we finally got to try reducing her Prednisone from 2x per day to 1x per day, she spiraled backward. Her neurologist is NOW thinking we may need to reconsider the original diagnosis and consider some of the other possibilties that he'd mentioned to us. Particularly... Lymphoma. This is obviously not good news at all. Our options are: 1) to put her through another spinal tap and send off more fluid samples - one to test for Lymphoma, the other to test for infectious disease, 2) give her a shot of aspariginase (sp?) which is the chemotherapy drug that would be used to treat Lymphoma - if it is Lymphoma she should show signs of improvement after 24-48 hours, 3) continue with the increased dose of CycloSPORINE and do no further testing.

It's obviously a difficult situation, particularly now that we're waiting for news on our court date and then travel. Lymphoma is a terrible diagnosis, because even with chemo, we're being told she'd have maybe a year. Putting her through chemo sounds awful, but apparently some dogs do great and it's only a few treatments, so most of that "year" she'd be feeling pretty good. Not doing anything doesn't sound fair to her either. When she's on a high dose of Prednisone and CycloSPORINE, she seems to feel comfortable. Tomorrow we drop the Pred back down since the increased dose of CycloSPORINE should be starting to kick in. It took a few days after dropping her dose before to see the negative result, so it'll be a stressful few days of watching her and praying she doesn't get sicker and feel so awful again. It's gut wrenching to watch her shivering and shaking in pain.

To top it off, she'd developed a mild ear infection, and definitely seems to be in a bit of discomfort from the 1/2" diameter bladder stone we've learned she has. I have added ear drops to our twice daily medicine routine, and the ear drops have left her beautiful, soft, long ear hair greasy and gross. Poor Chloe looks sickly and rather miserable. She's still got a fighting chance though... especially if it's not Lymphoma. Please keep her in your thoughts, your prayers, or whatever it is you do. She has been our little love bug for over 7 years, and I am definitely not ready to lose her. She's got so much attitude and spunk, if anyone could pull through it, it's her! She's got a consult with a new neurologist and an oncologist on Saturday... so hopefully we will be further enlightened after a new set of eyes look over her charts.

So, yeah. We've got a lot going on. My dad flies in late tonight for a visit and baby planning and celebration. While he's here, we hope to do whatever room re-arranging we need to do in order to start setting up for babies. That may include having him help us start prepping the mural wall with either a liner paper or a skim coat to smooth the texture. The tracking info on our mural shows that it's supposed to arrive on Thursday - Valentine's Day! That day is ALSO my dad's 50th b-day... so it'll be a fun and busy day! I also have to get the fabric for the baby quilts cut, and then get sewing! I have to paint the nursery, but can't pick out paint colors until I get the mural here. I think in a couple of weeks I'm going to be wrapping up a number of these projects and then I'll really start going nuts with waiting! Once the nursery is finished... I know I won't be able to stand waiting much longer to bring Ezra and Olivia home!